him.

so i guess last night was like our first fight.
it was pretty much my fault.
im just not ready.
im stubborn.
i have too much pride to admit that im wrong.
im to scared.
i know you want to tell the world. but im just not ready for that yet.
my past is still haunting me
i know you told me to drop the whole arguement cuz you are over it, but inside im still upset by it.
im just mad at myself for being to scared.

death...

i hate that you are going through this. i want to be ehre for you. but i dont know how too :( death is really hard. i had a hard time with it and i know you are too. just know that im always a phone call a text away from you and seriously ill be by yourside if you need me to be. im sorry you are going through this and im sorry i never know what the right words to say are. but time heals all wounds. and know that there are so many people other there that you can fall back on. and i am definitly one of them. many people are in hte same position as you and i know they are all grieving as well. i know you can do this. you are strong. but really cry if you have to. you dont have to tell anyone. let yourself feel the emotions. know that i am and always will be here for you.

relationship

man im scared to be in a relationship. i feel like im too wishy washy to be in one. i know i like him. but then im scared because he might actually stick around. unlike my last few who werent the type to stay or ready to stay. but here i am about to move forward with someone that might actually stick around. yeah i have doubts but it just feels so comfortable to be around him. he doesn't make me feel dumb or look down on me. he doesn't try and make me feel awkward. he just makes me happy. i doubt too much but i guess sometimes i just gotta take a risk.